The Day I Got Attacked by the Sock Monster

There used to be a time when I worked upwards of 360 hours a month. Now, you would presume that given such long days, that it would lessen the number of drinking hours in my week. However, that presumption is incorrect. The reality is that you get used so much to a non-stop lifestyle that it just seems normal to go a week without any rest.
In Korea, we get a week off for Chinese New Year, so it only stands to reason that during that entire week all of us did for 18 hours a day what we would do on a workweek only for 6 hours a day. Now, I have a superpower: I can fall into a deep sleep anywhere, in any position, even doing a split. During that entire week, I was afraid that I would fall asleep on the ski slopes, as we were riding around drunk in Yongpyong ski resort. I wish I could tell you more about the resort and the slopes, but I can't recall. I do recall that my buddy and I tried doing a double-black diamond while holding on to our bottles of soju, but it didn't work out too well; we essentially just slid down about 2000 meters on our assess.

Hours of deep meditation
My ass got soaked, but the soju kept me warm. Nonetheless, we decided that we needed to get back to the guest house in order to relax. Along the way we acquired enough alcohol to make Charlie Sheen tipsy. Some drinking games later, and I'm sleeping on the floor in a yoga mudra. I was told that I grabbed some random jacket, slipped into a yoga mudra, and slept for a couple of hours.
I woke up, no recollection of my karmic exercises, and proceeded back to drinking with the group. One table of soju later, and I'm sleeping on a chair. Now, my feet were exposed on the chair, and that means that the sock monster can get at you. Someone who will remain Kosta-tly unnamed decided to take off my shoes and cut my socks with his scissors. When I awoke, I just kept wondering what the hell I was doing that it would make my socks fall apart so quickly, but I didn't give it much thought, simply went back into the room and put on new socks.
The alcohol and the sock monster kept me in a constant loop that week. I wasn't sure whether I kept putting on broken socks, or how my socks kept getting eaten by the sock monster, but eventually I ran out of socks. I had to snowboard my last day without socks, but fortunately I had already trained very well for the past few days and my feet got used to being half-exposed in the snow.
I tried to get revenge on the sock monster, but his superpower is that he doesn't fall asleep, and that he's always stalking you. So, remember kids, if you find yourself in Korea, make sure you wear cheap socks, because the sock monster has no mercy.