Franklin wrote this letter to a friend who asked him for advice on how to control his sexual urges. Were Franklin alive today, he probably would have suggested a little Porntube too. Franklin says there is no hazard of children with older women, but technology has made it a hazard; so, this reason probably hasn't fully withstood the test of time.
My dear Friend:
I know of no medicine fit to diminish the violent natural inclinations you
mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is
the proper remedy. It is the most natural state of man, and therefore the state
in which you are most likely to find solid happiness. Your reasons against
entering into it at present appear to me not well founded. The circumstantial
advantages you have in view by postponing it are not only uncertain, but they
are small in comparison with that of the thing itself, that being married and
settled. It is the man and woman united that make the complete human being.
Separate, she wants his force of body and strength of reason; he, her softness,
sensibility, and acute discernment. Together they are more likely to succeed in
the world. A single man has not nearly the value he would have in the state of
union. He is an incomplete animal. He resembles the odd half of a pair of
scissors. If you get a prudent, healthy wife, your industry in your profession,
with her good economy, will be a fortune sufficient.
But if you will not take the counsel and persist in thinking of a commerce
with the sex inevitable, then I repeat my former advice, that in all your amours
you should prefer old women to young ones. You call this a paradox and demand my
reasons. They are these:
1. Because They have more knowledge of the world, and their minds are better
stored with observations, their conversation is more improving and more
lastingly agreeable.
2. Because when women cease to be handsome they study to be good. To maintain
their influence over men, they supply the diminution of beauty by an
augmentation of utility. They learn to do a thousand services small and great,
and are the most tender and useful of friends when you are sick. Thus they
continue amiable And hence there is hardly such a thing to be found as an old
woman who is not a good woman.
3. Because there is no hazard of children, which irregularly produced may be
attended with much inconvenience.
4. Because through more experience they are more prudent and discreet in
conducting an intrigue to prevent suspicion. The commerce with them is therefore
safer with regard to your reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the affair
should happen to be known, considerate people might be rather inclined to excuse
an old woman, who would kindly take care of a young man, form his manners by her
good counsels, and prevent his ruining his health and fortune among mercenary
prostitutes.
5. Because in every animal that walks upright the deficiency of the fluids
that fill the muscles appears first in the highest part. The face first grows
lank and wrinkled; then the neck; then the breast and arms; the lower parts
continuing to the last as plump as ever: so that covering all above with a
basket, and regarding only what is below the girdle, it is impossible of two
women to tell an old one from a young one. And as in the dark all cats are gray,
the pleasure of corporal enjoyment with an old woman is at least equal, and
frequently superior; every knack being, by practice, capable of improvement.
6. Because the sin is less. The debauching a virgin may be her ruin, and make
her for life unhappy.
7. Because the compunction is less. The having mad a young girl miserable may
give you frequent bitter reflection; none of which an attend the making an old
woman happy.
8th and lastly. they are so grateful!!
Thus much for my paradox. But still I advise you to marry directly;
being sincerely
Your affectionate friend,
Benjamin Franklin
