The Crowning of a King, Dethroning of a Beer

According to a friend of mine from West Amsterdam, Euroshopper beer is getting phased out. I'm too lazy to google whether that is true or not, but I will take his word for it. I think it has to do with the whole horse meat scandal, since horse meat was found in Euroshopper lasagna. Of course, that's just speculation on my part, but I think it makes economic sense.

Now, if you're not familiar with Euroshopper beer, it's one of the cheapest decent beers in the supermarket. For 1 euro a liter, you can knock yourself happy. I was pleased that public drinking is permitted on Queen's day because it allowed me to gauge how people responded to Euroshopper beer and me drinking it. One onlooker who noticed the beer said: "Man, that beer taste like piss."
Not a Euroshopper beer in my hand, but I thought
the horse made it relevant to the story
He then grabbed the beer can, examined it and noticed that the label was in more than one alphabet. "They sell this in Russia!?" he exclaimed after noticing Russian letters on the front.

"I don't know, but this beer taste alright to me. Beer is beer and the low price makes it taste better than you can imagine," I said. I kept drinking and interviewing people throughout the night about their thoughts on the death of a cheap beer, but I don't remember anything. I vaguely recall falling asleep in a gay bar and biking home, but I digress -- I should have taken notes.  

Anyway, the same friend in west Amsterdam who told me that Euroshopper is getting phased out also told me that it is the same formula as Bavaria beer. It's the day after Queen's day here, so I'm not in the mood for calling sources and googling leads; I'm simply going to accept that Euroshopper beer is the same as Bavaria. Even if I weren't hungover, I would still refuse to find out the truth, simply because I want to imagine that the most generic beer in the supermarket is just a better beer relabeled. Even if it's not true, I want to believe.

So, yea, I got the general impression that people weren't very impressed with my choice of beer yesterday. Maybe many people won't care if Euroshopper beer dies, but it has been on the market long enough for it to have made an impact on civilization. As the great philosopher Barney Gumble said: "We know how many people have died because of alcohol, but we don't know how many have been born because of it." I'm too lazy to google if it was really he who said that or if those were his exact words, but the truth is that Euroshopper reminds me of how true that quote is.

There are people walking around right now who were born because somebody bought a few liters of Euroshopper beer on fire sale. There are also people in the cemetery who were probably pushed over the edge by that same fire sale, but such is life: kings come and go. They say that the king will only have limited power, and I know it will be less than beer, for beer can give and take life.