The Hardest Thing About Dating White Women as a Black Man? Their Racist Girlfriend

I read an article yesterday about a 12-year-old black boy suspended from school for making prolonged eye contact with a white girl. It put me in a bad mood, brought back some memories. 

The other day I heard some American politician say that there is no problem with being afraid of boarding a plane full of Muslims. As I travel to my second Muslim country, I realize that I'm more afraid of boarding a plane full of white American women than I am of bunch of dudes with beards; from what I can tell, Muslim men treat me with respect, while white women fear my dark complexion, my sporadic Dominican smile, and my daydreamy gazes. Besides being accompanied by kids or by a white woman, there is almost nothing that won't take away white women's fears, and those fears are multiplied when their social circle is "infiltrated" by a negro. 

There was that depressed girl whose house was essentially abandoned, but I brought joy to her life, even her terrace went from total abandonment to an oasis. Surely, you'd expect that her girlfriends think I'm a good influence on her -- and nearly all did -- but it only takes one girl to spoil everything. "I'm worried about you," my girlfriend heard from Lupina [not real name.]
 
From the moment I met Lupina, I knew something was off. She didn't make eye contact, never directed her gaze at me; she exhibited all the signs of someone who was nervous and suspicious. I was absolutely not surprised when I heard that she had been telling my girlfriend to be worried about me, because from the moment I met her, she treated me as the scary "other." I don't even remember her real name; that's how little we interacted.

People like Lupina poison the well, and when they notice anything that reinforces their already preconceived notions, they go into full-attack mode. We were all sharing the same ski lodge during a vacation and, lo and behold, I made the mistake of drinking beer in the morning. Mind you, it was still 1am in Korea, from where we had flown, but it doesn't matter, she already had something that she could use to attack me.

When we all returned to Korea, my girl gets a text message telling her that I'm uninvited from a certain event, and wondering if my girlfriend was still gonna go. My girl stood by me, and I believe that this is only the case because she was Polish; had she been American like my previous ex, I don't think she would have stood by me.

It's a pattern that has repeated itself. I meet white girl, things are going nicely, then I'm introduced to her all-white female circle, and there is one girl who I feel behaves weird around me. In time, that weird-acting girl comes back to try and destroy the relationship. If my current relationship were to end, I don't think I could deal with the emotional headache that are groups of white women; I probably won't date a white girl again unless her social circle is multi-racial.